People Have The Power – U2 with Patti Smith [What Songs Inspire You?]

I love the message of this song.  And, Patti Smith is great live.  I’ve watched her sing this song with my kids many times.  They like the song.  Its up lifting.  To see Patti on stage (via video) close that night in London is inspiring.

I can’t wait to show my kids.  They like both Patti Smith and U2.

Watch the video and share your favorite U2 clips in the comments.  Actually, share any songs that inspire you to reach father and dig deeper to make the world a better place.  This is one of mine.


I can’t wait to see them when they return with some new music.  Who wants to see them with me?


Come To Me All Who Are Weary (Audio Lectio)

AUDIO LECTIO – “Come to me all who are weary.”

Jesus calls us to rest.  Do you know how to enter that kind of rest?
Jesus has something to say to the disciples.  Listen in….

I am sensing that the Spirit is calling me record audio lectio regularly.  If you find these helpful please comment below so I can sense where the Spirit is leading me and bringing fruit.  Feel free to share this if you find it helpful.

I know that some people have shared this with their small groups, or leadership teams.  If you happen to do this share here below or email me.  This encourages me and I’m open to doing things for your group.

If you have a favorite text you’d like me to record I’m open to that as well.


Jesus has something to say to the disciples.  Listen in….

“Come to me all who are weary”


If you want to share your experience or give feedback or request some passages please share below.


Lectio Divina – John 1:35-39

Lectio Divina is one of my favorite ways to interact with the loving presence of God.  Lectio Divina means Sacred Reading.  I first came across Lectio Divina while in Graduate school.  It is a formational reading and meditating on scripture.  We come to the living word of God with an open heart to hear the Spirit of God speak to our spirit.

There are 4 movements in Lectio Divina.  Read, Meditate, Pray, & Contemplate with moments of silence and listening and being with the presence of God.  In a future post I shall share more about Lectio Divina.  Lets jump in and hear my first recording of Lectio Divina.  I have lead many groups in this process.  This was and is my first reading and recording of Lectio Divina.  I welcome all feedback to make this process better and richer.

John 1 35 – 39 | 1st Lectio Divina

Path Forest

Help Me Jesus – The music that helps me

Tomorrow Sungshim and I teach and train couples in skills and knowledge on how to build up their marriage.  I wanted to prepare a little song set to play in the background.  The 1st 3 songs are a sort of “Help Me Jesus” songs.  I thought I would share here.


Lord, I Need You (feat. Audrey Assad) – Acoustic

  • Wow, Matt’s voice is soothing and piercing at the same time.
  • I found out about Matt because I really enjoy Audrey Assad’s music.


“Help Me Jesus” – The Staple Singers

  • I got my family into Mavis Staples.  She is such a wonderful singer and storyteller.
  • This song is from her earlier days.


You’re Not Alone by Mavis Staples Lyrics

  • I found this today.  A real gem.
  • This song is all about how Immanuel is with us and understands us.


Hand Model of the Brain [Dan Siegel]

Learning about the basics of the brain has propelled my relational wisdom and knowledge. Dan Siegel has been one of my main teachers via books, seminars, videos and articles.  He has some videos on YouTube that have proven tremendously helpful.  This short video describing some basic functions of the brain and how we “flip our lid” and can do something about it to calm ourselves down.  Watch this short video and share how you can imagine this being helpful to you in your relationships.  (FYI – Sungshim and I have taught this to our children when they were 4 years old.  If they can learn it so can you.  🙂



I encourage people to reflect on a few questions.

  • What stands out to you?
  • What do you think will be helpful in your relationships?
  • How can you imagine this would help you grow spiritually?

Shalom My Body

 I have taught people about the importance of slowing down and calming yourself down when you notice that you are upset.  I ask people to brainstorm ways that help them to calm their bodies down.  And, I think many people come up with good ideas.  Some come up with not-so-good ideas.  This process call Shalom My Body was something put together by Jim Wilder greatly influenced by Karl Lehman.  I have found this process truly helpful in creating a shift from some form of “upset” to a much more calm state in a fairly brief amount of time.  Much quicker than other options I’ve tried.

I have found that when people are willing to try something new transformation can more readily flow.  Especially if the “new thing” comes recommended by someone you trust and they report positive results.  Of course, I also believe that you should test these things for yourself.  Do not just take my word for it, try it out for a period of time and check the results.

Jim Wilder demonstrating “Shalom My Body”

I welcome your thoughts and actually I appreciate them.  You help me make this a better place and provide me valuable information through your sharing.


Feeling Appreciation Daily – Worksheet

z1 + z2 at fountain

Learning what is necessary for any person to place themselves in a state of mind (brain) to perceive others, including God, relationally is vital to experience peace and love (growth too).  This simple worksheet helps to prime our brains so that we can be in a state of mind to perceive God’s presence as well as other people as relational resources.

Download the worksheet here.

Feeling Appreciation Daily (Appreciation + Interactive seats) [Marriage Retreat 2014]


From now on, brothers and sisters, if anything is excellent and if anything is admirable, focus your thoughts on these things: all that is true, all that is holy, all that is just, all that is pure, all that is lovely, and all that is worthy of praise. (Phil 4:8)

We can train ourselves to focus our hearts and minds.  Would you like to learn how to pay attention in such a way that builds up your marriage, family and friends?


We have 60+ couples from our church, YNCC, attending a Marriage Day Retreat on Oct 4.  A few months ago the Spirit of the Lord seemed to have put on my heart that this will be a special day for all who attend.  I’ve been praying and preparing for this day together.

I sent an email today to all the couples and plan on posting the videos and worksheets I shared in the email here so it is easy to find.

In preparing for the retreat I asked the couples to watch 2 Gottman Videos.
I encouraged each couple to watch these and reflect on them together.

John Gottman: The Magic Relationship Ratio

Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse by John Gottman [9:58]

The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse by Dr. John Gottman that can predict relationship disaster and even physical illness and disease are: Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, & Stonewalling. Dr. Gottman offers ways of healing conflict.

Marriage Missions – One of my favorite resources to share with couples

People often ask me for a good website to search for articles or videos on Marriage.  This is one of my first go to websites.

Here is what I share in an email to couples.  I hope you are encouraged to do likewise.

Marriage Missions

  • Check out website and become familiar with
  • Find 2 articles that inspire you to grow in your relationship
  • Discuss what you learned and how this will help you in your relationship
  • Email me your reflections.
  • Reflecting and sharing is key to learning and growing.
  • Any questions feel free to ask me.

Below is their Mission Statement & Clarifying Phrase.  (I’ve never heard of that before 🙂

Marriage Missions


Marriage Missions International exists to inspire, encourage, and equip those who are married and those who are preparing for marriage, by providing practical, Biblical resources through e-mail, our web site, teaching and one-on-one opportunities, revealing the heart of Christ within marriage, so they are better able to:

“Be imitators of God as dearly beloved children and to live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.”(Ephesians 5:1-2)


Revealing the HEART OF CHRIST within marriage throughout the world.

3 Ingredients to Change

What is needed for people to change? To truly be transformed into a new kind of person?


I’ve thought about this for most of my life and all of my adult life. So, this writing won’t encompass my thoughts on this subject and yet I thought it framed the question nicely.

I came home today and overheard my wife speaking on the phone. It was in Konglish so I could only understand portions of it. Grateful for the portions I could understand. She was talking with one of her close friends about another conversation she had today with a mentor about 3 elements involved in people changing. (These are my reflections from what I heard and I do not want neither my wife nor mentor to be debited with any poorly stated thoughts here).

The 3 ingredients are:

Understanding the Past
Knowledge of Virtue (aka, the good life)
Practicing the Virtue

I will ever so briefly share some initial thoughts about each one to spur our thinking.

Understanding the Past – looking at our personal history to understand where we get stuck and seeking healing and awareness.

Knowledge of Virtue – This is transfer of information of what the good life looks like.

Practicing the Virtue – Acting in wise ways that put into practice some aspect of the good life.


What percentage would you place for each category?

Initially I am only sketching these 3 briefly. In future writing I will take some aspects of life and run it through this grid. Possible topics to run through the grid are anger & anxiety. If you want to see some other aspect run through this grid please share in the comments.

*Note: I am not limiting myself to only these 3 ingredients as part of change but painting with very broad strokes to spur on thinking and conversation. You can keep spurring others on, including myself, if you comment below. I would appreciate that. I enjoy thoughtful conversations.